Arrival

Have you you ever been on the precipice of a decision. You look at it and it seems like it is an impossibility. That once you make it you are committed to the changes it brings about. I am talking about relationships in this instance.
Here I am looking out over my life and am faced with the decision to commit myself to a relationship in a way that says you have my heart. I know guys in general don't talk that way it is not macho. Well the hell with the macho image. I don't care about that. What I care about is where is my heart.
Like what was shared by someone on this blog that I need to cherish the past good memories and hang on to them because they are part of who I am. Those good memories and good times I cherish and will never let go. I am a better man for them. And while saying that I must include the bad memories, though they literally gave me grey hair and a heartache I will say I have grown into a better man for them. Do I say I am thankful for those experiences, I would of rather not of gone through that part of my life. But since I have then I must try to make good from them. This is what I have chosen in my life. I have no hatred or hard feelings from that time. Not now.
My heart has been touched by someone special. When you get touched like that it is hard to explain how it affects you. I can say that I am a lucky man because this is the second time in my life this has happened. Most people don't even get once.
So with that all said what have I decided to do? You want to know don't you? :-)
Well, I will say it would be foolish of me to let her get away and I am no fool. Good things and good people come into one's life a few times and when they do they change you. So hanging on to the good in life no matter what package it comes in is important. Life is hard enough as it is. I have good people in my life, my family they are wonderful and make me smile. Life to this point has been a blessing if you look at the right way and still is. Yes life has changed for me quite a bit actually but I am not running away and complaining that I have a few bruises from the experience. There are other people out there who have gone through bigger scrapes then me and have a story and a smile to share.
I am ready for the new chapter to begin in my life. I know it has its challenges but life without challenges is dull to say the least isn't it? Change for me like I said is not easy but here we go right into a world of change one step at a time...........
Do I know how things will work out for me, no. But not knowing what tomorrows holds is the mystery that makes us wonder and dream and aspire to bigger and better things. We get creative when faced with the challenges of life. We step up and try to make things happen, to get around, over, through the obstacles of life. When we do we see what the possibilities are. No one can say if a relationship will stand the test of time, not knowing shouldn't stop us from trying. Not trying is the greater evil if you will. How can one win a race if he never enters the race an runs it. We are better people when at least we try and fail then to never have tried in the first place. That is where lies the never knowing.............not giving it a chance.

This is how I feel.
So the beginning has begun.......